Visiting the Kraken
by Baby Girl's a Queen
Summary: Kel falls pregnant before going to war. She has already faced many enemies in battle, but can she face her family and friends?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** None of the characters belong to me. Italic text indicates it has been written by Tamora Pierce.

In the common room, Kel picked at her food, too tired and stressed to eat anything. It had taken two weeks in the wet and the cold to reach Wolfwood, a village near the Scanran boarder, and Kel had to "talk" to Lord Wyldon before he started giving out orders for all of the young green knights to go on boarder patrol.

Kel was about to go up to her room when a tall figure appeared in the doorway. Kel froze and her heart clenched. There he was – his hair dishevelled, his clothes muddy and as handsome as all hell. Kel certainly hadn't lost any interest in Cleon of Kennan over the three months since they had last met.

Kel felt the tingles run up her spine and her blood run cold with fear and wasn't entirely pleased with the two sensations. She was as happy as ever to see him but she wasn't ready to tell him the consequences of the night they had shared three months ago.

"Cleon!" Merric of Hollyrose yelled out from the end of the table. Everyone called out their greetings and Kel could feel the smile light up her face as he smiled back at her. She did notice though, that his smile had not quite reached his eyes. He didn't seem to notice the seat Neal offered him beside Kel and instead took a chair near the prince.

"_Why are you here?" asked Faleron of Kin's Reach. He was one of the knights destined to defend the seacoast. "You're heading the wrong way."_

_Cleon glanced at Kel, then looked at Faleron. "I got message asking me to come home soonest. You've heard there's flooding in the southwest hills?"_

_Faleron, whose home was near Cleon's, sighed. "It's bad," he said. "Father said a lot of fiefdoms lost their entire stores of grain – oh, no. Yours?"_

Kel's heart thudded. She had always known Cleon's home fief was short of money and she new every noble families solution – arranged marriage. She looked up to see that almost half of the table had shifted their gaze from Cleon to Kel.

Cleon had seen Kel go stiff at his news and regretted what he was about to do with all his heart. "Kel, may we please have a word in private?"

Kel's thoughts raced as she led Cleon up a narrow flight of stairs to her room. Kel realised that she couldn't tell him now. She knew Cleon was a man of honour and telling him she had fallen pregnant would force his hand to marry her instead. Kel's fief was not wealthy, her dowry had to be spent to send her to be a knight in training. Kel could see that if she married Cleon, his people would starve and she knew she was making the right decision.

"Kel, my fief has lost everything," as Cleon's voice rang out emotionlessly she knew he had rehearsed this speech, "I must marry Ermelian of Aminar or my people will starve." It was at this point he broke down, but only slightly, "I'm so sorry Kel, I know we talked about marriage but it's the only way to buy grain for my people."

Kel had kept her face Yamani blank during his speech and now, as Cleon began to fall apart, she was the one to comfort him. "We always knew it was a long shot, Cleon, we did talk about it. I know this is your duty – it part of being a knight, sometimes you have to make a sacrifice."

Cleon looked at her gratefully, "It didn't stop me dreaming though, that's what makes it that much harder now."

Kel reached up to put a hand on his face.

"_Don't." He twitched away from her touch. "I can't – I'm as good as married now. It wouldn't be right."_

The silence after that was awkward and uncomfortable. "Why don't you go back downstairs for dinner. I was heading to bed anyway."

Cleon gave a stiff nod as he turned his back as walked out of his life.

Kel let herself cry after Cleon left and she had cried herself to sleep that night as Tobe listened quietly from his palet on the floor. He could not understand how the strong, fearless knight who had saved him was now so helpless.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** None of the characters belong to me. Italic text indicates it has been written by Tamora Pierce.

Kel looked up at fort Giantkiller with awe. It was hard to believe this was the same fort she had helped third company to build the previous year. Since Wyldon had arrived, walls had been heightened, extra barracks put in and defenses generally improved.

Kel swallowed hard as she envisioned the man that had ordered these changes. Kel's old training master was strictly conservative and had always been against women in battle and Kel knew that he was one of those people she had to tell.

"Kel, Kel!" someone cried. Kel looked up just in time to see Owen of Jesslaw barrel into her and grip her in a fierce hug. He pulled back quickly, "Sorry Kel, I didn't mean to treat you like a girl."

Kel laughed as she looked down into the repentant face of the boy who she looked on as a younger brother. "I don't suppose the Stump lets you barrel into all of his guests then?"

Owen blushed but seemed to remember what he was doing, "I have been sent to show you all up to your rooms. Follow me."

The chatter was easy as all of the young knights caught up with their friend. As they delivered the last of Kel's friends to his room Kel whispered to Owen, "I don't suppose I could have a little chat with Lord Wyldon before you show me to my room?"

***

Kel was shocked as Owen introduced her to Lord Wyldon with perfect manners. 'The Stump's finally broken him to bridle' she thought to herself.

"Enter, Mindelan. I can "chat" with you now."

Kel watched as Owen walked out and shut the door. And then turned her attention back to Lord Wyldon.

"Spit it out Mindelan, I don't have time."

"It's about my posting sir, in the war." Keladry paused again, then in a smaller voice, "I'm pregnant, sir."

"What!" Lord Wyldon looked up, immediately flustered, "What are you doing at war, Keladry, in that condition? What do you think you're going to do? Just go off marching into battle as if nothing is different? Who's the father? Are you even going to get married?" Lord Wyldon was yelling at this point. He took a breath to calm himself, "Look, never mind any of that. Have you been seeing a healer?" His tone now was calm and kind.

"No." Kel looked down at her feet, "I haven't told anybody yet."

Lord Wyldon put his face in his hands and sighed before looking up. "I want you to see a healer. I'll find a position for you. You won't like it, but at least you won't be amongst those gossip-mongers at court. I think of you as one of my own daughters, Keladry, I don't want you to get hurt."

***

That night at supper Kel watched as Owen led her friends away to receive their posts one at a time. As she waited she tried to play chess but lost repeatedly due to her lack of concentration. She didn't want to be sent home. No matter how afraid she was of Blayce and the killing devices and of the war, she wouldn't be forced to give up her shield and go home a failure. She couldn't face everyone at home right now, not as a disgraced lady and a disgraced knight.

Finally Kel was the only one left in the room, waiting to be called. The butterflies in her stomach were flitting frantically, almost making her sick with worry. Lord Wyldon would call her a failure. He would regret ever letting her continue page training. She would be sent home, dishonouring her mother and her father. And she couldn't bare it.

Finally, Owen arrived to take her in to receive her fate.

"Good luck." Owen said with a firm hug as he ushered her into the office.

"I won't dance about," Lord Wyldon told her as she sat nervously in front of him, "I'm giving you the hardest assignment in the district. I think you will hate it."

Kel looked confused. She had not expected this. "My Lord?" She questioned, encouraging him to go on.

"Necessity has called for me to build and staff a refugee camp. There will be about 700 refugees by the end of the summer, of all ages," he tapped a map set in front of her, "and this is the only land I can get for it. My fort will patrol to keep Scanrans from getting very far, but there's too much empty ground and too much forest to plug all our gaps."

Keladry nodded, still confused as to what she could at with a refugee camp.

Wyldon looked at her and understood the look of confusion, "You're a good commander Keladry, and in times like these we cannot be picky about our commanders. It's work, Keladry, important work, though most of those around you will disagree that helping the poor is worthwhile. You'll see fighting, too, there is no doubt about that, and we can only give you minimal soldiers. What do you think, will you do it?"

Kel looked up shocked, "I didn't expect to be given a choice, sir."

"Sometimes it is better to have understanding than obedience.

"The truth is you're the only one I can trust to do the job. Most nobles would treat refugees badly, others are not cut out for leadership or needed elsewhere." Pause, "I heard you took a new servant, it was a good thing to do, to save him. It's acts like that that make me think you would be perfect. But I understand if you feel you would rather go home to Mindelan or …"

Kel shook her head, "No sir, I'll do it. I understand, I know my duty."


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** None of the characters belong to me. Italic text indicates it has been written by Tamora Pierce.

Kel stood ringing her hands outside Neal's room. She had never been this nervous to see him, Lord Wyldon had reacted surprisingly well but she was sure her best friend would demand answers from her. What made things worse, Neal had always looked at Kel as "one of the boys" – this was one conversation she knew he wasn't expecting with her, ever.

Kel finally reached up to knock after loitering outside Neal's door for almost twenty minutes now. She wanted to leave, to find a healer she would never have to see again, but it wasn't like Kel to run away from any of her problems, and certainly not this one. She reached up and swiftly rapped three times on the hard wood.

Neal answered quickly, calling out for her to come straight in.

"Hi Kel." Neal looked up and saw her Yamani mask firmly in place, "What's wrong? You hardly ever wear that look anymore. You know you can talk to me about anything… I know you haven't talked to anyone about Cleon yet."

"It's not exactly about that, Neal." Kel's voice sounded uncharacteristically uncertain, "I need to talk to you as a healer _and_ a friend." Kel paused and Neal nodded for her to go on. "You remember when Cleon came to visit us all about three months ago?"

"He came to visit you Kel. Lets not pretend your relationship never happened." Neal was looking at Kel so calmly and it gave Kel an extra boost of confidence to continue.

"We… we decided to further our relationship." Kel was watching Neal closely, she new that he was prone to overreactions, so far he seemed to be trying his best to imitate a Yamani mask. "And now there seem to be … complications." Kel watched as Neal's mask slowly crumpled, revealing confusion and doubt.

"What do you mean by 'further our relationship', Kel?" Neal's voice was carefully smooth, even if his mask had broken, Yuki had managed to rub off on him, Kel thought. "And what kind of 'complications'? Did Cleon ever hurt you Kel?"

"We slept together! Happy Neal, that's as blunt as I can put it." The stress of telling Lord Wyldon and now Neal had finally snapped Kel. Kel continued a little quieter, worried about the colour Neal's face was now turning, "I'm pregnant."

"You're pregnant, Kel! Pregnant!" Neal's voice was outraged, "And you're here preparing to march into battle? Does Wyldon know? He can't know, only a lunatic would send a pregnant woman into war." Neal paused to breath, "And you say you need a healer? You haven't seen a healer yet?" Kel shook her head slightly, "Gods Kel, Cleon visited three months ago! Three months! You must have known before we set out. How could you be so stupid!"

Neal stopped when he saw the tears now streaking down Kel's face. He had never seen Kel cry and the sight of his best friend caused him physical pain. 'I told her she could tell me anything, and now look what I've done.' Neal mentally berated himself. Outwardly his expression softened and he took Kel into his arms, reassuring her that everything was going to be okay.

When Kel had calmed down she told him, "I told Wyldon, Neal. I told him before we were given assignments, that's why I'm being shut away in a refugee camp instead of boarder patrol…. It's better than being sent home. This way I don't have to give up my shield and shame my family."

Hearing Kel talk about shame, Neal wondered where Cleon was through all of this. Cleon was the perfect knight: brave, skilled, and most of all chivalrous. The Cleon Neal knew would not have left Kel alone to deal with this. Cleon would have dragged her home with him, made an honourable woman out of her, floods or not. He would never desert her.

"Kel," Neal started slowly, he didn't want to shock her, "Does Cleon know about this baby?"

"No." Kel's voice was soft and Neal could hear in it exactly why she didn't tell him. Because Kel was also the perfect knight, and she had made this sacrifice to protect Cleon's people. Now that she sat in his arms, Neal could see every sacrifice she had made to be a good knight. Everything she had given up and every bruise she had been given. All towards being the perfect knight she was today.

Neal put that behind him. He couldn't deal with that and be a healer. Neal pulled up her shirt slowly and placed a glowing green hand over a belly that only just showed the slight curve of pregnancy. Kel looked into his face nervously, 'she knew she should have visited a healer as soon as she suspected anything, what if something was wrong with the baby, what if riding, or weapons practice had harmed it in any way. She was still not sure what she thought of this baby, but she had an overwhelming urge to protect it.'

"He's perfect, Kel." Neal smiled warmly up at her. "He's going to be just fine."

"It's a boy, then?" Neal nodded in confirmation, as Kel's face lit up, just a little, at the news of her baby.

"Kel," Neal paused, he knew this topic would be sensitive, "Kel, Cleon deserves to know. He's a good guy and he should get the choice to be in the baby's life."

"I can't tell him Neal. He as a duty to his people. I'll tell him someday, but not now. I can't stand between him and his people, I can't let them starve."

Neal nodded, this was as he had suspected. "Don't worry Kel, your boy will have more big brothers than he can cope with, what with your year mates and the Own."

"We'll all look out for him Kel. He won't grow up fatherless."


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** All characters belong to Tamora Pierce.

***

Time passed by at Haven.

***

It was coming into Kel's fifth month of pregnancy and she knew she could no longer hide her pregnancy from any of her friends. She had called a meeting for all of her friends in one bell's time and she had decided to be dramatic and wear her tightest shirt. The curve of her pregnancy was now clearly evident, especially in contrast to her previously toned stomach.

As Kel walked into the meeting room she felt every set of eyes lock onto her and then first Fanche and then the boys raked their down her body. All confidence Neal had given her in encouraging her to tell everyone quickly disappeared as she felt judgement creep into the eyes of those she trusted most.

Kel cleared her throat and the eyes snapped back to rest on her face, "I called you all here to because I have some personal news to share with you." Kel's voice was clear and commanded their attention. "I am here to announce that I am pregnant and, if what the healers tell me is correct, I will be giving birth to a boy in four and a half months."

Fanche's face softened and she walked over to Kel. Placing her hand on Kel's stomach she smiled up at Kel, "You'll be a wonderful mother, Lady Knight."

"Thankyou." Kel's whisper was so low it could not be heard be the men now standing around the room. It meant so much to her to have a mother say that to her.

"If you ever need someone to talk to or some reassurance, you just come talk to me." Fanche replied just as softly then turned to return to her seat, glaring at the men until they retook their seats. Kel looked around at her friends: the shock was slowly melting off their faces and she could tell they were accepting the news.

"So our very own mother is finally going to be a mother." Merric laughed solftly before coming forward and hugging her in congratulation.

***

"Just keep breathing Kel. Now Kel, when I say I need you to push okay?" Neal's voice was calm, he had done this a million times before.

***

Kel's friends were gathered around her bed, all staring in awe at the tiny bundle of joy. All of Kel's friend's in the area had been given leave to come and see her and even Roaul had managed to come down for a few days. She was so glad to have them here to celebrate the birth of such a beautiful baby boy.

"Look at all his toes! They're so tiny!" Owen was the most vocal of her new baby's admirer's and his loud exclamations had almost had him kicked out.

"He's perfect, Kel." Merric had been so supportive of her since she had opened up to him about. "What have you decided to name him?" As he asked the question he lifted one finger up to gently stroke the fire engine red fluff on top of his head.

Kel down at her son with a smile, "I thought I'd call him Anders, for my brother."

Neal leaned down to whisper in her ear, "And will you be telling Cleon any time soon? It's as plain as day that he is Cleon's son: Cleon's hair, Cleon's eyes, nobody could deny it."

***

"She's what?" Lord Roaul's voice roared out and could easily be heard from all over the fort. "I could have sworn you just said that Kel had run off!"

The pause was tense and the air was thick enough to cut with a sword.

"Her son is out there Wyldon! Her son! And you expect her to sit at home and hope the search party does its job?"

***

Neal looked around the room and called attention to all the young knight present. They were all close friends of the Lady Knight. "Listen up, men! I think we all know where Kel has gone." The men nodded. They were all so worried for Kel, but didn't know what to do. "Well, I propose we provide some reinforcements."

Some of the boys looked uneasy and after glancing around uncomfortably, Emmit of Fenright spoke up, "We all love Kel, but it would be treason to go with her. Why don't we just go out there, give her a knock on the head and drag her back tied to her horse before anyone has time to accuse her of treason." Emmit looked around uneasily, "None of us want to end up on Traitors Hill, Neal."

"Do you really expect her to come back that easily?" Merric sounded angry and for the first time people looked down at him on his sick bed, "Her _baby_ is out there! And you expect to be able to drag her back? You don't have to come, Emmit, but don't stop us. Some of us really care for Kel!" Merric was now breathing heavily and everyone could see he was serious.

"Merric," Neal said in his best bedside manner, "You can't come with us. You're injured. There is no way."

Merric's voice was stealy, "You will tie me to my horse, if you have to – I am coming."

All the boys nodded their heads this time. They knew what was at risk, and they knew what they were doing.

***

Kel's return to Corus was a happy one. Even if she was to be sent to Traitor's Hill, Anders would be safe. He would grow up, and follow his dreams, he would meet a pretty girl, Kel knew he would have trials, but it would all have a happy ending.

Merric had been riding beside her on the way back and she had laughed half the trip. Kel had grown so much closer to Merric over her time at Haven: he supported her, he comforted her, he made her laugh, he sent tingles up her spine whenever he walked in a room.

***

Kel couldn't believe it! She wouldn't be dying! The King had chosen to label the group heroes instead of traitors and Kel could feel her feet floating away from the ground.

Suddenly Kel was on her feet and embracing Merric. She could feel herself rising onto her toes but couldn't seem to understand how she was moving. Slowly, and without thinking, she pressed her lips ever so softly against Merric's and kept them there, frozen.

Their lips were both chapped and dry but as Merric timidly began to move his against hers, growing in passion. She knew it was right.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** All characters belong to Tamora Pierce.

"I thought you said you were going to tell him today." Neal spoke from behind the fitting room curtain. "He's at the palace, you know. You're going to have to face him at dinner."

Although Neal never mentioned _his_ name, they both knew who he was talking about. Kel had always promised herself that one-day she would tell Cleon but she had managed to put it off till the end of the war. They had been back at the palace for three days and had been avoiding him.

Anders was now almost four years old and every day he looked more like Cleon: he was tall for his age with flaming red hair and piercing grey eyes. He loved the many corridors of the palace and Kel had quickly become exhausted chasing him all over the giant rabbit warren. His favourite game had fast become knights, he would insist they go down to watch people train in the knight's practice courts and then try to copy them. Kel's fellow knight's also found it very amusing to watch "The Yamani Lump" display so much emotion as she pretended to be the damsel in distress.

Kel stepped out from the fitting booth, showing Neal her new dress, "Cleon's a married man, now. And from what I hear, happily married." Pause. "What if he doesn't want to be part of Anders' life?"

"We've been through this, Kel. Anders is wonderful, everyone thinks so. Cleon will want to be a part of his son's life." Neal spoke kindly and she knew he was telling the truth. "The dress is good, by the way. Merric will love it." Neal winked at her, trying to lighten the mood with talk of the upcoming balls to celebrate the end of a long war.

"Thanks Neal. Now lets get going, if I'm going to tell Cleon before Anders is a _real_ knight, it had better be today." The two friends walked back through the city, Neal chatting easily to try and keep Kel relaxed. He could tell it wasn't working as Anders ran up to meet Kel at the gate: she had her Yamani Lump face on and Kel _never_ wore her Yamani Lump face for Anders. Never.

***

"I don't want to wear my good clothes, Mummy. I don't want to!" Anders was about _this _close to throwing a temper tantrum.

"Now Anders," Kel said in a firm voice, "Would a good night start whining just because he had to ware good clothes?"

"No, Mama." Anders hung his head.

"And are you go to be a good boy for Mummy when we meet Sir Cleon Kennan?"

"Yes, Mama."

Anders was usually had such a cheerful disposition and scenes such as these were rare. He had his tantrums, as every three year old does, but Kel realised her stress must have seeped through to put him so out of sorts this early in the day.

***

Kel took a deep breath and straightened Anders tunic a final time before knocking on Cleon's door. She was glad he was staying here in the knight's wing, it meant he had not brought his wife to Corus and this was not a conversation she wanted to have with Ermelian of Kennan.

Cleon lumbered over to the door. He still had a hangover from some solitary celebrations the night before – okay he would admit it, he was drinking alone. He had not expected anyone to come and see him this morning, all of his year mates had other plans for today. Expecting to have one such knight demanding he came down to the practice courts before lunch, he flung the door open unceremoniously.

Kel thought the shocked look on his face was priceless as he looked first from Kel and then to Anders, both standing at his door in their Sunday Best. His jaw dropped slightly before he quickly straightened himself up, ran a hand through his sleep mussed hair, and swept into a low bow. He was now glad he had fallen asleep with his boots still on last night.

Kel finally couldn't hold it in anymore, she giggled as she curtsied and Anders gave his most formal bow, then swept Anders into Cleon's rooms ahead of herself.

Inside his room, Cleon was looking more confused by the second as his eyes flicked from Kel to Anders and back again. Kel almost started giggling again as she realised he had no idea who Anders was, even after seeing him.

"Cleon, I would like to introduce you to Anders. Anders, this is Sir Cleon of Kennan, knight of the realm." Cleon rose his eyebrows, even more confused by his formal introduction. Answering his unasked question Kel added, "Anders has his heart set on being a lone knight, rescuing princesses, fighting off barbarians and raiders, and we thought you might be able to talk to him about it."

Cleon smiled, "Well, I'd be honoured to tell you all about it Anders, but I would think Sir Keladry could have told you all you want about being a knight and then some." Cleon looked up at Kel in admiration, "She doesn't like to boast but Sir Keladry has been on more adventures than you've had Sunday dinners."

Anders looked up at Kel with veneration in his eyes, "You've been on adventures, Mama?"

Kel looked back at Anders with love as shock and then anger flashed across Cleon's face, "I'll tell you about them later darling. We're here to listen to Cleon's adventures today." Kel flashed a warning glare at Cleon.

Cleon looked back at Anders and forced a smile before launching into extravagant tales of bandits, immortals, and saving a princess or two.

Half a bell later Neal knocked on the door and Kel, expecting him, answered the door. "Does he know?" Neal whispered, looking pointedly at Cleon.

"Yes, but we haven't had time to discuss it yet."

Anders, hearing his mother whispering to his "uncle" Neal, looked up suspiciously. Neal had formerly had been his hero: playing games, healing him, and standing up to his mother's regime of five serves of vegetables a day; hero in the past tense now he had met Sir Cleon.

"Time to go, Anders. We're going to lunch while you mother has a talk to Sir Cleon." Neal saw the tantrum approaching and added quickly, "We want to get lunch before your mother comes down and then I'll take to down to the practice courts and play swords." Kel smiled thankfully at him as Anders got up and trotted out the door, eager for seconds of sweets at lunch and playing with his new wooden sword.

***

Cleon's face had contorted into one of anger after Anders had left the room. "Mama, Kel?" Cleon glared at her, "I expected someone else would steal your heart, I've even heard stories about you and Merric, but I never expected you to get over me that quickly!" Cleon's face clearly portrayed the rage and hurt he was feeling.

"Cleon." Kel voice was cold and angry now, and Cleon paled at the thought, "Anders will be four in two months. Now think, what were we doing a little over four years ago?"

Cleon was more stunned than ever and looked shaken. "Oh." His face had blanked now but a million thoughts were rushing through his mind. "You… you should have told me Kel. You know I would have married you in an instant. I loved you. And now I'm a married man and can't do anything about it. I still love you, Kel."

Kel's face had softened during his speech, "That's why I didn't tell you Cleon. You would have rushed in and done the honourable thing, and your people would have smiled. I loved you too, but I love Merric now.

Merric loves me and he loves Anders, but he will never be Anders' father." Kel's voice was hardly audible now, "He'd like it if you would be in his life. He doesn't know you're his father, and he's never questioned why he doesn't have a father, but he will soon. I'd like it if you could be there for him then."

"I'd like that too."


End file.
